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Every week, The Post will bring you our picks of the best one-liners and stories from satirical site the Babylon Bee to take the edge off Hump Day.

An unlicensed plastic surgeon nicknamed "Dr. Frankenstein" cut his ankle monitor this month and disappeared three days before his trial for allegedly disfiguring patients in Florida.

Erica Schneider’s biological children, Landon and Charlotte Ghekiere, were caught up in madman Alan Smith’s rampage in Billings, Montana, on Sunday.

Missouri grandmother Kathy Kite refuses to stop serving free homemade breakfasts to her community despite warnings from county health officials.

Oil Dumps As Iran, Oman Push To Reopen Hormuz; Satellite Image Shows Gulf Producers Ramping Up

Brent crude futures dropped for a third session as Iran and Oman advanced plans for a temporary maritime corridor through the Strait of Hormuz.

Brent tumbled to $85 a barrel early Wednesday, down more than 9% for the week, while West Texas Intermediate traded around $80. Crude remains up more than 41% this year following the US-Iran conflict and ongoing disruptions at the Hormuz chokepoint.

Earlier, Oman's state news agency reported that Iranian Foreign Minister Abbas Araghchi and Omani Foreign Minister Badr Albusaidi discussed an "interim framework" establishing a temporary joint shipping corridor.

Iranian Deputy Foreign Minister Kazem Gharibabadi said both countries agreed on a temporary route and intend to negotiate a permanent corridor within 30 to 60 days, according to Tasnim. No timeline has been given for when the temporary deal to reopen the critical waterway would begin.

Talk of an interim deal comes as oil loadings from Iraq's Persian Gulf export terminals surged at the beginning of the week, offering one of the clearest signals yet that regional Gulf producers expect Hormuz tensions to dissipate.

Satellite imagery showed seven tankers collecting Iraqi cargoes, with a combined carrying capacity of roughly 13 million barrels, according to Bloomberg.

Maritime research firm TankerTrackers also reported on X, saying, "A busy day in the Gulf of Oman, where there are at least fifteen sets of STS transfer sessions taking place. We count 25 million barrels of crude oil; plus some refined products. The oil originates from almost every country in the region, minus Iran."

A busy day in the Gulf of Oman, where there are at least fifteen sets of STS transfer sessions taking place. We count 25 million barrels of crude oil; plus some refined products. The oil originates from almost every country in the region, minus Iran.#OOTT #IranWar #Tankers pic.twitter.com/TAba26mJiW

— TankerTrackers.com, Inc. (@TankerTrackers) August 25, 2026

"It seems crude is now beginning to price in a sooner rather than later peace deal," said Dennis Kissler, senior vice president for trading at BOK Financial Securities, who Bloomberg quoted.

Kissler noted, "With some oil still getting through the strait, Iran and the US are more likely to be in a newer state of de-escalation as both sides are looking for an off-ramp."

By now, readers know that the energy crisis is not necessarily about crude, but rather refined products, as diesel crack spreads in the US topped $100 a barrel. The good news is that, by midweek, the spread was trading around $88.

Related:

• Diesel Crack Spread Madness Deepens As Jefferies Finds No Easy Exit From Russia's Refining Crisis

Last week, veteran commodities strategist Jeff Currie detailed on X that the next commodities bull market was poised for another leg higher (read note).

The latest developments in the Gulf are promising signals, but an interim framework should not be mistaken for a durable normalization of regional tanker transits through the maritime chokepoint. Previous de-escalation efforts have repeatedly broken down, often returning the region to drone attacks on tankers and short-lived military tit-for-tat bombing campaigns. Until a permanent and enforceable shipping deal is set in stone, the Hormuz risk premium is likely to remain embedded across crude and refined-product markets.

Tyler Durden Wed, 08/26/2026 - 06:55

With camp nearly over, it feels like a good time to check on how some players have seen their stock rise recently or dip.

Dolly Parton deserves a front-page farewell.

Officials expect lava heights to grow rapidly to about 500 feet.

Bateman’s small group was an offshoot of the polygamous sect once led by Warren Jeffs.

The NYPD is training a fresh batch of pooches for an elite unit with touching 9/11 ties.

The next Atlantic tropical storm will be named Dolly, a coincidence following the death of country music legend Dolly Parton on Tuesday.

Zelensky Continues To Oppose Wartime Democracy Amidst Escalated Election Demands

Authored by John Weeks via Antiwar.com,

Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky is facing mounting pressure to hold elections. The Ukrainian leader was elected to a five-year term in 2019, which expired in May 2024.

Last week, Ukraine's former defense minister Mykhailo Fedorov publicly called for elections, breaking what has been characterized as a "wartime taboo" within the nation's elite. He continued to demand elections over the weekend and also directly accused the Defense Ministry of corruption.

Fedorov is not the first high-profile Ukrainian figure to call for elections. Back in 2024, Kiev Mayor Vitali Klitschko denounced Zelensky and called him an "autocrat" for refusing to hold elections. But Fedorov is the first figure to have served within the upper echelons of the national government to publicly endorse the restoration of democracy.

On Sunday, Zelensky released comments slamming Fedorov's recommendation as a threat to Ukrainian national security. "I believe that if we want to destroy the country, then during such a war we can move in the selection of elections," Zelensky said.

While Zelensky has portrayed wartime elections as an existential threat to all of Ukraine, he also said he would be open to elections if the nation's allies secured "specific conditions" that would allow all military personnel and displaced civilians, millions of people, to participate. This pledge undid the myth that Ukraine is forbidden to hold wartime elections by its own constitution under material law. It is also such an unlikely scenario; Zelensky appears open to democracy while safely shielded from it. If elections were held, he would lose.

The challenge from Fedorov is significant because the 35-year-old was the youngest minister of defense in Ukraine's history, and his firing last month triggered protests throughout the country. Despite having no military experience, the former tech entrepreneur was viewed as revolutionizing Ukraine's drone warfare. He only served for a few months before a rift with Gen. Oleksandr Syrskyi, commander of Ukraine's armed forces at the time, prompted Zelensky to fire him.

After protests broke out following Fedorov's sacking, Zelensky tried to placate the people by firing Syrskyi as well. This has not turned down the temperature, as protestors want Fedorov reinstated.

The anger is understandable. Zelensky and his administration are keeping the nation at war, and there is no end in sight. The war has been the justification for martial law, and the martial law has been the justification for the temporary, indefinite suspension of democracy.

Tyler Durden Wed, 08/26/2026 - 06:30

Putin's invasion of Ukraine stunned the world — but it was just the latest chapter in a dark epic of imperial aggression stretching back hundreds of years.

While biohackers are "optimizing," regular people are left wondering how rigid their routines really need to be for better health and well-being. And something crucial may be being forgotten.

This summer, the Giants believe they have more than 53 NFL-worthy players on their current roster.

NY Post readers discuss Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez not paying her student loans, despite her $173,000 salary.

“We cannot have a society where all the value goes to 2,500 people sitting in Silicon Valley,” Chief Executive Alex Karp said at a company boot camp last week.

Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY), who has been meticulously documenting the entire process on her Instagram vlog, has said she’s undergoing the procedure to “feel more in control of my life” and “empowered” –  but with the Democratic Socialists of America (DSA) takeover of the Democratic Party complete, according to Knowles, the videos read very differently. 

Affordability is the runaway top concern for battleground Senate race voters heading into the midterms, and no other issue is even close, a massive grassroots survey found.

'The Path to Zero' is a sober look at Biden administration's hasty retreat from Afghanistan in 2021 on fifth anniversary of terrorist strike that killed 13 US troops and 170 civilians